20 Facts You Didn't Need to Know

I have this older brother, but this post isn't about him. I essentially grew up as an only child because he is that much older than me, so this post is about me. On my blog. I'm writing about myself on my blog.

You're stunned, I know, but that's sort of the deal you signed up for when you decided to read this post about me on my piece of the web.

Welcome to my self-centered life!

But I bet you didn't know that I had an older brother? (Unless you're one of the three readers of my site: Hi Dad!) That's the theme of today's post though! Or more specifically:

20 Facts About ME That Might Surprise You (Or At Least, Cause You to Question Your Readership of this Blog)

1) My most favorite article of clothing that I have ever owned happens to be a lavender, corduroy pea coat from the Gap circa 2003. I was clearly a fashion maven. HOWEVER, Radiant Orchid was named the 2014 Pantone Color of the Year so maybe I was onto something all those years ago. Ahem, Fashion, you owe me.

2) I went to one traditional high school class for about 30 minutes in the 11th grade. I left halfway through my math class to drop it and enroll myself full-time at a local community college. I "graduated" high school when I received my diploma in the mail.

3) When I'm getting a table at a restaurant or a dressing room at a store, I'll usually say that my name is "Jamie" or "Annie" because people CANNOT spell "Shasta" and I get tired of this game:

"What was it again?"
"Shasta."
"C-H-A....?"
"No, it's an S"
"C-S-H-A...?"
"No, it's-nevermind. Whatever."

4) Lemon-flavored candy is my least favorite candy. Orange-flavored candy is a close second. I will pick out these Skittles from the bag.

5) I became passionate about literature while I was attending a college-preparatory school from 7th-10th grade. It rivaled my love for the sciences and the only reason literature truly won my heart was because of amazing back-to-back teachers every single year. Mr. Green, Ms. Stray, and Mr. Linn - I owe you all a huge thank you.

6) I have an older brother. OK, so maybe I mentioned that already, but it bears repeating in list format.

7) Planning our wedding was the most stressful time in my life. Since this was in the days before Pinterest, I was scouring bridal magazines trying to make sense of all the chiffon and tulle on my own.

8) Speaking of marriage, I did not take my husband's last name. This is mostly because I am lazy.

9) I have a freckle under my right eye that people typically mistake as a smudge of makeup or piece of dirt. One time, this woman was so insistent that it could just be "wiped right off" that she proceeded to take her thumb and poke me in the face with it.

"Wow, it really is a freckle!"

REALLY? You could have fooled me, lady.

10) According to the Myers Briggs personality test, I am an ISFJ (Introverted, Sensing, Feeling, Judging). For the most part, I would say that is pretty accurate. I'm also on the Virgo/Libra cusp for what it's worth (nothing).

11) I have one of those "You look familiar" faces and it drives me bonkers when people start insisting that I am so from Pennsylvania - the Pittsburgh area, that's it! when I've never been to Pennsylvania.

12) I do not know how to swim, and there have been many, many, too many times where swimming has been required of me in both my personal and professional lives. For the love of all that is holy, please make sure your children can swim because otherwise, they will turn into landlocked adults with an unnatural fear of drowning (BECAUSE IT'S ALL TOO POSSIBLE!)

13) I am a big fan of young adult fiction. My undying love for Harry Potter is the culprit there. I frequently imagine myself as a high school English teacher in some alternate universe encouraging young people to DROP THE JANE AUSTEN and pick up something that is more age-appropriate but equally (albeit differently) valuable.

Don't get me wrong - there is a time and place for fuddy, duddy British authors, but there are so many other good books out there that are more relevant to the average teenager (and will have a better chance of inspiring a lifelong passion for reading!)

14) I like spoilers for movies, books, pretty much anything with a plot. It's a terrible, terrible habit, but I just.have.to.know.whathappensnext.RIGHTNOW!!!!! (DUMBLEDORE DIES!)

15) With that, I really don't enjoy surprises.

16) Podcasts have totally changed my running game. The History Chicks happens to be my favorite channel right now. Biting commentary of great women in history? SOLD.

17) I am a recovering coupon cutter. No, seriously. Only in the last few months have we been able to finish off the seemingly endless supply of personal hygiene products in our house. I bought shampoo for the first time in YEARS this last January. It was a problem.

18) Other than an occasional glass of extremely sweet wine that still tastes like grape juice, I seldom drink alcohol. It tastes super yucky to me and I don't need alcohol to be an asshole to be funny.

19) I have extreme product loyalty and get really perturbed when brands change up their original formulas. For example, the first generation of the Brooks Pure Cadence shoes were the pair that I started running in more seriously, but the additional generations? GARBO! I'm currently running in my second pair of Asics Gel-Lyte33 (second generation) and I don't know what I'm going to do when those shoes kick the curb (about 200 more miles) because the third generation? PROBABLY GARBO!

20) I am not a big breakfast person. I loathe pancakes. Maple syrup is sickly, sweetly gross. The closest thing I eat that resembles breakfast is probably cereal, but even that I eat sparingly. I typically just have a fruit smoothie or yogurt in the mornings.

21) BONUS: I make the best chocolate chip cookies that, ironically, require pancake mix. Recipe forthcoming.